Random Puns

Old burglars never die they just steal away.

My job at the concrete plant seems to get harder and harder.

A toothless termite walked into a tavern and said, "Is the bar tender here?"

It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.

To Do Lists

14 Things to Do with a Potato
Just in case y'all needed a list.

16 Really Weird Things to Do
These will most likely not help you gain any friendships.

21 Things to Do While You're Not Wearing Pants
Keep your underwear on, folks. This isn't THAT kind of list.

15 Things to Do at a Sleepover
Make that slumber party less slumber-y and more party-y!

17 Ways to Be a Stupid Dumb Idiot
Why are you reading this list? You really are an idiot.

The research assistant couldn't experiment with plants because he hadn't botany.

I sat up one night pondering what makes the sun come up. Suddenly it dawned on me.

An office with many people and few electrical outlets could be in for a power struggle.

We were so poor when I was growing up we couldn't even afford to pay attention.

The movie about the mobile home was advertised with a trailer.

What is the difference between a nicely dressed man on a tricycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tire.

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